Fonda Cucumbers Condoms
The batty liberal screwballs are at it again. America’s favorite Viet Nam War Hero (now a born again Christian) Jane Fonda has found a new “crusade”. Between her Hollywood comeback, her Face And Ass Lift Operations, Jane has found a new cause.
“Hanoi Hanna” now spends much of her time running all up and down the West Coast visiting public schools and handing out “free condoms” to little kids, (the little rascals think they are balloons) the kids started taking them out in the schoolyard, filling them with water, and then throwing them at each other. “Oh Boy”, water bombs. Some of the other kids were wearing them on their heads, others were blowing them up then sitting on them, a few blew them up then put them in the teachers desk drawer. One kid took his home, put it over his dog’s head and suffocated him. (to death) ha, ha.
Well it hasn’t taken the Liberal Kooky Dip Shits long to swing into action to fix this problem, they have started a program out there in the public schools that teach these kids the proper use of a “French Tickler”, "by God we know whats best for these kids and we'll show them how it's done. (God bless Jimmy Carter)
Left Coast Teachers are now being supplied with “Big Cucumbers” along with their electric pencil sharpeners.
Each morning Ms Jones, who is little Jimmy’s “social study’s” teacher hauls out her “big fat cucumber", then she holds up a nice new Lamb Skin Condom, (hot damn), all the kids are on the edge of their seats, “WOW” what’s Ms Jones going to do, YOWEEEE.
Ms Jones then proceeds to show the class of Eleven and Twelve year old students the proper way to “Don A Condom”, as Ms Jones unrolls the soft lamb skin protector down over the “Green Cucumber” she starts to breath heavily and a slight mist develops in her left eye ball, she try’s to speak to the class but all that comes out is a garbled gurgle, she then starts drooling, her lips and eye lids are twitching, she starts kicking her desk, some of the children start crying, Ms Jones now has the cucumber in one hand and is punching the blackboard with the other, the children have now panicked, some have ran screaming from the room others have urinated on the floor, several have fainted.
The commotion has attracted the attention of Mr Smith the “Diversity Teacher” next door, he enters Ms Jones classroom and is astonished at what he sees, Ms Jones is under her desk holding a Cucumber, she is moaning and shouting obscenity’s, children are calling for their mothers and up on the wall behind Ms Jones desk is a large portrait of Jane Fonda holding a Box Of Condoms, under the picture there is a sign that reads, “FREE CONDOMS, HAVE YOU GOT YOURS YET”
Outside, several ambulances and the local “Swat Team” have arrived. Ms Jones had a heart attack under her desk and died.
Several Days Later At Little Billy Baileys House 3:00 PM.
“Hi Mom, I’m home”
“Hi Billy, how was school today”
“It was Ok Mom”
Pause
“Hey Mom”
“Yes Billy”
“Mom, have we got any Cucumbers”??
“Hanoi Hanna” now spends much of her time running all up and down the West Coast visiting public schools and handing out “free condoms” to little kids, (the little rascals think they are balloons) the kids started taking them out in the schoolyard, filling them with water, and then throwing them at each other. “Oh Boy”, water bombs. Some of the other kids were wearing them on their heads, others were blowing them up then sitting on them, a few blew them up then put them in the teachers desk drawer. One kid took his home, put it over his dog’s head and suffocated him. (to death) ha, ha.
Well it hasn’t taken the Liberal Kooky Dip Shits long to swing into action to fix this problem, they have started a program out there in the public schools that teach these kids the proper use of a “French Tickler”, "by God we know whats best for these kids and we'll show them how it's done. (God bless Jimmy Carter)
Left Coast Teachers are now being supplied with “Big Cucumbers” along with their electric pencil sharpeners.
Each morning Ms Jones, who is little Jimmy’s “social study’s” teacher hauls out her “big fat cucumber", then she holds up a nice new Lamb Skin Condom, (hot damn), all the kids are on the edge of their seats, “WOW” what’s Ms Jones going to do, YOWEEEE.
Ms Jones then proceeds to show the class of Eleven and Twelve year old students the proper way to “Don A Condom”, as Ms Jones unrolls the soft lamb skin protector down over the “Green Cucumber” she starts to breath heavily and a slight mist develops in her left eye ball, she try’s to speak to the class but all that comes out is a garbled gurgle, she then starts drooling, her lips and eye lids are twitching, she starts kicking her desk, some of the children start crying, Ms Jones now has the cucumber in one hand and is punching the blackboard with the other, the children have now panicked, some have ran screaming from the room others have urinated on the floor, several have fainted.
The commotion has attracted the attention of Mr Smith the “Diversity Teacher” next door, he enters Ms Jones classroom and is astonished at what he sees, Ms Jones is under her desk holding a Cucumber, she is moaning and shouting obscenity’s, children are calling for their mothers and up on the wall behind Ms Jones desk is a large portrait of Jane Fonda holding a Box Of Condoms, under the picture there is a sign that reads, “FREE CONDOMS, HAVE YOU GOT YOURS YET”
Outside, several ambulances and the local “Swat Team” have arrived. Ms Jones had a heart attack under her desk and died.
Several Days Later At Little Billy Baileys House 3:00 PM.
“Hi Mom, I’m home”
“Hi Billy, how was school today”
“It was Ok Mom”
Pause
“Hey Mom”
“Yes Billy”
“Mom, have we got any Cucumbers”??
posted by Red Burtt | 1:26 PM
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