"HELLO"

I hate Cell Phones:
Everywhere you look to-day you see people walking, driving, running, standing still, laying down, kneeling, and going to the bathroom with one of these stupid bastard phones stuck to the side of their head.

The next time you see a “phone freak” blabbing away in the middle of the street get up beside them and listen to the senseless shit they talk about, why do people call someone up on the phone and talk about their laundry while they’re walking down Main St.

How in the name of God did us “old people” ever make it through life without one of these blasted infernal rotten devices?

I just bought one today, I am looking at the little TV screen on it wondering what the hell is going to come up on it, does it have “dirty HBO democrat pictures on it” is it looking at me, I’m afraid of the damn thing.

Do people use their Cell Phones when they are having sex, do Cell Phones ring when you are having sex, do people answer them when they are having sex, if people do answer them when they are having sex do they say, “call me back, I’m having sex”?

Author: Red Burtt